How Transforming A Pessimist Into An Optimist Fits Our Core Values

Life tosses us curveballs. Just when we think we're getting a handle on things, something comes up to challenge that thought. The "previous me" would have jumped on that opening with a contradictory "positive that I'm negative" affirmation that life is always hard. If you re-read those two opening sentences, it's clear that nothing in them suggests the sky is falling. My most recent curveball placed me in the unique position of transforming a pessimist into an optimist.

For all those who have read some of my history in previous pages, including my story of overcoming codependency, the idea of me being able to advise anyone about being optimistic would bring about skepticism, if not outright laughter. But sometimes life tosses us curveballs. Being part of this editorial team has given me some new skills that allow me to barrel up some of those curveballs and drive them out of the ballpark.

I wish the idea of this new page would have come to me before writing about a diary of gratitude. The order would have made more sense. But I didn't think of it then, so we'll roll with this progression.

I guess I needed a little push and it came when discussing some of our website posts with a couple of people. They were asking about some of our content and it was pretty obvious early on that they didn't see things the same way. They were weighed down with heavy doses of self-defeating pessimism.

Since I've spent some time in that lonely spot, I was able to commiserate with them, which is all well and good, but doesn't always do much to improve their situation.

Transforming A Pessimist Into An Optimist, Beginning With Myself.

This worked for me, it is well on the way to working for the guys I referenced in the previous paragraph, and it will work for you. If you work it! I'm tossing in something that might seem as being out of context when describing the process of transforming a pessimist into an optimist, but it was probably the most important step in my journey and was provided free of charge, with a wry smile from one of my co-editors.

I'll begin with that gift followed by three changes in thinking, then a bit of technical stuff. Keep this in mind. Being an optimist doesn't mean we've lost touch with reality. It doesn't mean we've adopted the Pollyanna Syndrome.

We'll close this page with why it will be beneficial to you. Everyone wants to know the "why," the benefit gained. I sure did. So let's give you some things to change in your thinking.

That important free gift from my co-editor came to me when I was moaning about the state of affairs in the world. My bellyaching descended into a doomsday prediction, followed by how it adversely affected me. The wisdom came through clearly, albeit cloaked in humor. "Get over yourself. You don't have influence over every world event."

Ego is a curious thing and sort of a metaphor for this page about transforming a pessimist into an optimist. We think of ego as bellicose and brash, overwhelming and overriding. And it can be those things. But it is always part of the psyche of pessimists. They, formerly me included, think bad things will last forever and ruin our lives.

Sometimes we add a little more fuel and blame ourselves for everything. A pessimist's ego is disguised. It comes out softly, often just within our own thoughts. Thoughts that have powerful effects, mentally and physically.

Our human brain can be strengthened to do amazing things. Transforming a pessimist into an optimist is a gradual process that begins with reframing our thoughts. Recognizing ego is vital in every human interaction and it is the key first step in this process. When we recognize the signs of ego, our brains can reframe our thinking. With that hurdle cleared, we move onto three smaller targets.

Pessimists see every challenge, every obstacle as a perpetual condition or situation. They think bad things will last forever. Since we've cleared that passive ego hurdle, aspiring optimists allow their amazing brain to reframe the same situation as temporary, localized to only part of our overall existence, and certainly the sky is not falling. Many of these perceived traumatic events never even happen, or don't really affect us all that much anyway.

Pessimists see things as omnipresent. They believe an isolated event will surely ruin every part of their life. Optimists learn to observe without judgement. "Does this really affect me at all? Am I assuming the worst? Do the actual facts support my fears?"

Pessimists share this third trait with codependents. The self-blame label finds it's way to the surface far too often. Pessimists fall into the revolving door of blaming themselves for everything, as if they really have any control over outcomes. Some for sure. All? Nope, we're not that omnipresent nor perpetual.

To supercharge transforming a pessimist into an optimist, whether it's yourself or you are guiding someone through the process, check out our page about a diary of gratitude. You'll find some powerful ideas to assist your brain in this transformation. Begin by writing down three good things that happened during the day. We're learning to look at the big picture, not the narrow incident.

Optimists focus on "What if?" Optimists ask "What is an alternative outcome instead of my reactive fear?" In short order an optimist will train his or her brain to look for outcomes rather dwell on flaws. And then you'll reap the benefits.

What Do I Get?

There are dozens of very technical studies available that support this next statement. Transforming from a pessimist into an optimist increases physical health in ways that will astound you. We listed some in that page about a gratitude journal. There is concrete evidence that a life of optimism can reduce disease numbers. Mental acuity, cognitive function, memory, and decision-making will increase.

Calmness and composure, a sense of peace, defined purpose, personal confidence, and poise are more character strengths after transforming from a pessimist to an optimist.

And of course, you'd expect this one. All those traits in the last paragraph will help you grow as a leader. Simplifying leadership development is one of our core values. The steps in transforming from negative worrying to positive thinking are simple.

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